


walk away

by ZeGabz



Category: Emma Approved
Genre: Alex's POV during ep 69, F/M, my attempt to follow book canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-12
Updated: 2014-08-12
Packaged: 2018-02-12 22:15:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2126505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZeGabz/pseuds/ZeGabz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He knows it's going to hurt. He knows every tear she sheds is going to twist the knife in his heart a little deeper. He knows she might not even welcome what comfort he can offer, because of the way he left things between them.</p><p>But Alex Knightley is a man madly, deeply in love, so he goes to her anyways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	walk away

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even know where this puppy came from. It just happened. The things seeing Alex Knightley's beautiful face does to me . . .

He knows it's going to hurt. He knows every tear she sheds is going to twist the knife in his heart a little deeper. He knows she might not even welcome what comfort he can offer, because of the way he left things between them.

But Alex Knightley is a man madly,  _deeply_  in love, so he goes to her anyways.

He's always gone to her, will always go to her. He remembers her stricken face as he left her after the Boxx debacle, her quiet tears after Elton fired her, and he imagines the pain he's bound to find her in.

"Damn Frank Churchill," he mutters, approaching the building. He walks in quietly, stopping at Harriet's desk to say hello. She's engrossed in her work when he walks in, eyes focused on her computer screen. "Harriet?"

She jumps, her chair swiveling back. "Alex!" she squeaks. "You're . . . you're back . . . ?"

"I heard about Frank," is all he says in reply. But Harriet doesn't seem to be completely listening as she usually does, staring at the doors with a distant expression. "Harriet?"

"S-sorry," she stammers, "It's just been a really weird day."

"I'll drink to that," Alex mutters under his breath. "So is Emma here?" Does she want to see me? remains unvoiced, but Harriet understands.

"She's in her office, probably looking over some accounting stuff." Alex quirks an eyebrow.

"Emma accounting?" he asks. Harriet glances down.

"It's been an . . . adjustment not having you around," she says quietly. "And like I said in my voicemail, Emma's been upset." Alex remembers getting it, and remembers dialing her number then and there, more angry words and declarations of love on the tip of his tongue. "But she's doing better now." Harriet meets his gaze then, something she'd never really been able to do before. "We need you back, Alex. Emma needs you. She . . . she told me she didn't want to do any of this alone."

Alex's heart clenches in his chest, and he tries and fails to push down the flare of hope surging through his veins.

"Is she-can I see her?" he asks, his voice stumbling a little. Harriet regards him curiously for a moment, and then nods. Alex says nothing else, his feet carrying him down the familiar hallways of the little empire he and Emma have built together. Years of teamwork, of late nights and Chinese takeout. Years of late nights reminiscing on their shared childhoods, years of lunches with her father.

He can faintly hear her voice as he nears her office, and despite himself, he smiles a little. Of course she's filming, Emma Woodhouse, true to form, must capture everything- even her failures and heartbreaks.

The repeated thought of Emma's heartbreak furthers his anger towards Frank Churchill. He doesn't, and will never deserve the force of nature that is Emma Woodhouse.

 _And you do?_  the taunting voice in Alex's head sneers.

He begins to understand her words as he finally approaches the doorway he has so often lingered outside of.

"Have I really been this blind or have I just been lying to myself this whole time?"

There's a certain resignation, a break in her tone that stops him in the doorway. For a split second he takes her in, her soft skin, her hair, worn collected to the side in soft waves, and he makes his decision.

If he talks to Emma now, he will bare his soul. He will tell her everything, and leave absolutely nothing out. He will kiss her.

That's not what she needs right now. She's getting over one guy already, the last thing she needs is another, one who hurt her so deeply so recently, giving her his heart and asking for hers in return.

"Well, that stops now," Emma says to the camera, and Alex turns, leaving the girl who has somehow become his entire world to her solitary soul searching.

He's never been much of a drinker, but he suddenly feels the urge to drown his sorrows tonight.


End file.
